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Wednesday, August 10, 2011

You want to fly what? You're just and Idiot!!

So boys and girls last night my husband informed me that he wants to fly helicopter as a hobby. I informed he was an idiot.
Or a Dumbass whatever, and I probably gave him this exact look!

The conversation went down like this. And in case you get confused like I always do this I am M he is H.

H- So babe, I was looking into Helicopter Pilot schools, cause I think I want to fly helicopters as a hobby.
M- (Staring at him with No Words) 
H- What?
M- I don't even have words 1. You have never even flown ON a plane before! 2. You don't have 20/20 vision 3. Pray Tell who is paying for these lessons. 4. You're an idiot! 5. You're an idiot! 6. You've never been ON a fucking plane!!!!!
H- I don't know why I tell you anything! You're joy kill, you take the fun out of everything. I mean this has always been my dream. I don't take your joy away.
M- All I want is sprinkley cupcakes and shiny things, I don't want to get in a death trap, and pretend I can fly it!
H- Well I never shit on you're dreams I let you do whatever you want with the house!
M- Oh I beg to differ! We fought for like a day over the fucking roofs and shutters, and we haven't even gotten inside the house, you say I don't care do whatever you want, but YOU LIE!!! YOU LIE like a RUG!!
H- I do not!!! 
M- Oh but you do!
H- Whatever!!!! I am going to fly helicopters, you'll see and you'll think it's so cool cause we can take off and land where ever we want!
M- Blink, Blink

M- You do realize you can't take off from wherever and land wherever you want asshole, they have air traffic laws, you of ALL people should know this shit! And you go ahead and do that and when you are sitting in Federal Prison I am gonna come and LAUGH and say so was it as sweet as you thought Maverick?
H- Shows how much you know, Maverick is from Top Gun and he flew Fighter Planes F14A Tomcats to be exact! So Maverick did NOT fly Helicopters!!
M- I'm sorry I fell asleep after Top Gun.
H- You're a Bitch you know that right? You just don't support my dream!
M- I would support you're dream if it was fucking PRACTICAL! You have never stepped foot IN a plane before, Helicopters are death traps, and a lot of experienced pilots get sick in them because they are different than planes. And you have the worst sinuses in the world you would whine like a bitch in the air, there is NO way you'd make it as a helicopter pilot! 
H- No shit Sherlock, that helicopters are different than planes did it take you long to figure that out? And I just want to do it as a HOBBY I don't want to be a full time pilot TY!
M- You would still whine like a bitch with your sinuses. But you do what you have to do Mr. Hobby Man. 

And that is pretty much exactly how the conversation ended and he was a pouty bitch because I don't support his DREAM!!! Whatever, dream another dream buddy, that one is insane. So boys and girls do your spouses  or SO's have wild dreams? Do they want to do something so off the wall that you look at them and question their sanity? Please share so I don't feel like my husband is the only asshole in the world.

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